April 2005

World View

In the Midst of the Storms I Find God’s Grace is Sufficient

By Susan E. Reed

IMB ISC Missionary
Published by Midwestern Seminary

My journey to overseas missions began in 1997 at a missions fair held at Bellevue Baptist Church, Memphis, Tenn. As a single mother, I made a promise to God that when I was through raising my daughter I would commit my life to overseas missions. My daughter, Elizabeth, was 12 at the time.

It was just a few months later that Elizabeth was diagnosed with Neurofibromatosis 2 (NF2), a rare and complicated neurological disease. We were told that her body would produce fibrous tumors (also called lesions) on her nerves which would, from time to time, need to be removed as they became symptomatic. We considered this an inconvenience, nothing more.

Two years later Elizabeth would have her first surgery. Two lesions pressing against a nerve in her upper left arm were causing numbness and loss of muscle tone. The surgery was a success.

Later that year we moved to the Kansas City area. God’s hand was definitely in the move as He quickly provided a job, a place to live and a wonderful school for Elizabeth. I was also close to family once again.

In 2001 Elizabeth would require two surgeries. In June, Elizabeth had surgery to repair a paralyzed vocal chord. Her sweet voice had become hoarse. A tumor pressing against a nerve leading to the vocal chord rendered it useless. The surgeon’s plan was to place an implant next to the impaired vocal chord, causing it to meet with the healthy vocal chord. Shortly after the surgery, however, Elizabeth contracted bronchitis, then pneumonia. Her constant coughing caused the implant to be dislodged. Her raspy voice became a whisper.

It was also at this time that I noticed Elizabeth walking with an uneven gait. An MRI showed a sizable tumor on her upper spinal chord. Her neurosurgeon told us that immediate surgery was required. So, on the first day of her sophomore year, Elizabeth underwent surgery to remove the tumor.

Early indicators showed that the surgery was a success. Elizabeth had mobility in her legs and her vital signs were strong. It was not long, however, that she would experience complications, including intolerable and uncontrollable pain. Her case was an enigma to the physicians and nursing staff. Elizabeth’s legs grew weak and, despite rigorous physical therapy, she would be confined to a wheelchair. At an age when she had just begun to taste independence, she would soon require assistance in every area of her life.

Two days before her 16th birthday Elizabeth was transferred to an area children’s hospital for physical and occupational therapy. The hospital staff was unable to control her pain as their main focus is on acute pain following surgery or accidents. It was while she was here that the doctors determined that they needed to intervene with her weight management. She had always been petite, but the combination of intense pain and the side effects of the required high doses of pain medication caused her to become alarmingly thin. The doctors inserted a feeding tube, through which she would receive most of her nutrition.

For two months she suffered through hours of physical and occupational therapy. We had no idea how fast her little body was deteriorating. She was finally homebound. Each day we watched her become weaker.

Elizabeth was able to spend the Christmas holidays at home. A bright spot in Elizabeth’s life came on January 13, 2002, when she received a Yorkshire Terrier, whom she would name Grace Angelica, because she was a gift from God. Grace was given to Elizabeth through the Dream Factory, an organization which grants wishes of chronically ill children.

On February 6, Elizabeth would be readmitted into the children’s hospital. Her feeding tube had collapsed, requiring a new type of feeding tube, through which she would receive all her nutrition and medication. Needless to say, her weight continued to decline, and her little body succumbed to pressure sores because of immobility. At the time of her discharge her 5’4” frame weighed barely 70 pounds.

Throughout this time I was working a fulltime job. I would go from work directly to the hospital, where many nights I would sleep by her bedside because she wanted me to perform many of the nursing duties. It was my privilege to do so. She was my baby.

In March, with little explanation, I was fired from my job. But even as I was leaving the office, I knew God was in control. At that point, God answered so many prayers. I had no idea Elizabeth’s time on earth would be so short. The time I was able to spend with her those last two months cannot be taken away from me. The church we had been attending (not yet members) stepped in and assisted financially so that I didn’t have to work or look for work.

On April 14, during the evening worship service my pastor introduced to my future boss, Dr. Phil Roberts. A lover of God’s word, and an aspiring missionary, Elizabeth listened intently as Dr. Roberts spoke on Mormonism. Elizabeth’s arm was so weak, she asked my mother to take notes for her. She didn’t want to miss anything.

The next morning, while I was out running errands, Elizabeth slipped into respiratory failure. She was transported by ambulance to the hospital, where it was discovered that she had an inoperable tumor on her brain stem. We took her home, anticipating a miracle or her death.

On Saturday, June 8, at 8:15 p.m., as Elizabeth’s classmates were on a bus heading to church camp, Elizabeth went home to be with her beloved Jesus. Jesus had answered our prayers of complete healing. She was out of pain in the presence of her Lord whom she loved with all her heart.

At that moment, I wanted to go home, too. What was there to live for? I had lost my identity. Elizabeth was my life. I cared for her around the clock and in an instant she was taken away from me. What was my purpose now?

I was reminded of my promise to God years before when I yielded my life to overseas missions. Her heavenly Father was caring for Elizabeth now. I had completed my task.

In December, 2003, after months of prayer, filling out applications and waiting, I received word from the International Missions Board (IMB) that I had been accepted as an International Service Corps. (ISC) candidate. In January, 2004, I attended an intense three-day candidate conference where I would take the next step in God’s plan for my life.

In July, I will be traveling to Richmond, Va. to complete orientation before leaving for my assignment in Warsaw, Poland. What God has in store for me, only He knows. And that’s all I need to know!